It seems to me that there is little to no encouragement of a marriage until that marriage is on the rocks. Even in Christian circles that tout “strong, godly marriage for life”, no one takes time to encourage those in healthy relationships – all focus is on those in trouble.
I was struck by this last night while reading an email from our photographer. We just did a photo shoot (more on this later), and our photographer said in the email that “your love shows, just by the looks on your faces.” She was encouraging us to keep loving each other like that, which is fantastic!
Scott and I were talking about this, and realized that in the last year and a half that we have been married, we have received very few if any compliments like this one. That’s what I don’t understand. When kids do well in school, their parents congratulate them. When an employee does well at work, the company acknowledges them. When a family member buys a new house, the family gathers round and gets really excited. Why doesn't this happen with marriage?
Why, when a marriage is doing really well, does no one compliment on that? And I'm not just talking about our marriage, but a lot of marriages that I see. It is more common to receive a positive compliment or word of encouragement when things get really tough – but if those compliments and encouragements come when things are going well, maybe the tough spots will become fewer and farther between. Because, lets face it, when you’re doing something right and someone acknowledges that – you want to keep doing it! When you’re struggling and someone says something, it can be a lot harder to get to the point where you’re doing well.
Our goal has always been to have a marriage that people look at and say that we’re doing something right. Of course this doesn’t always happen, and we have our problems just like everyone else. But, it’s important to keep remembering to encourage marriages while they’re strong, so that they continue to stay that way.
-Sarah
No comments:
Post a Comment