Joy in Pain

My last post was about reconciling death with joy and mourning. God gave me an opportunity to practice this just a few short days after that entry.

My Grandmother had been in the nursing home for three weeks when Jesus took her home to meet him. My heart was filled with both sadness and joy: sadness at not seeing grandma ever again, but extreme joy that she is with Jesus ("She can eat again!" is what my niece was happy about).

A few short hours later, that joy was overcast when we received news that my Grandfather had also died that morning. He was involved in a tragic accident, and none of us were expecting his death, especially not the same day as his wife. For a few days, the joy of Grandma's death was lost in the darkness of Grandpa being gone. Questions of where the good was, why this would happen, and how we were going to cope filled my mind.

Our God is a great God.

I had the opportunity to visit my grandparents the day before their death. I sat by my grandma's bedside and held her hand, humming hymns to her and loving her. I had the opportunity to whisper goodbye for good to her, and it was a great time of seeing grandma for the last time.

I was also able to spend good time with my grandpa, probably the best in years. I went with my dad to pick him up from his home, spent time alone with him just catching up on life. I got to see the love that he had for my grandma expressed more deeply than ever before, as he kissed her and said he loved her. I gave him the biggest hug I had given him in years, and told him I would see him later.

This visit was nothing short than a miracle. I almost didn't go, but God knew that i would need to visit my grandparents in order to have a sense of peace about their death, and I am so blessed by that visit. Our family was also able to experience the true body of Christ. There were over 500 people that came to offer hugs and prayers at the visitation. Several families, including my best friend from Lafayette, came to visit us, even though they had never met my grandparents. The hotel workers offered our entire family a discounted rate on our rooms. Food was provided to feed all 50 of us (I have a lot of cousins) for 3 days.

God is good. Grandpa and Grandma are experiencing no more pain, no more sadness, no more hardships - they are with Jesus now.

It is still hard, I miss them and I always will. But I have good memories of them, memories of hugs and gifts and grandma's chip-dip, and grandpa's gum drops, and their love for us...their love for Jesus, and their love for us.

Goodbye Grandma and Grandpa - I am so blessed that you are with Jesus, and that one day I will see you again. I miss you. I love you.

-Sarah